10:34 PM

I have been full of ideas and wanted to write all day. Now that I have a chance, I don't know what to say.



I am sitting at the computer in the basement listening to the dryer tumbling and I'm waiting to hang my husband's work pants. They will take about 15 minutes to dry so that is my deadline.



I was talking with a friend the other day and my mom was mentioned. She asked if I have always been close to her. I told her that I have and she said that she is close to her mom too. Later my husband and I went to dinner and we were talking about my daughter. I had been thinking about her a lot and I said how much I miss her. I almost started crying.



I always thought we would be close because moms and daughers have always been close in my family. I assumed the same would go for me. Unfortunately, that is not the case and it can be really hard at times.



Trace Adkins sang a song called You're Gonna Miss This. It talks about the everyday parts of life with your kids that you are one day gonna miss. The chatter and the fights and the laughter that is part of your life with your kids. One day before you realize it, they are gone and you do miss it.



I miss being part of her life. I miss the every day activities. I know that once you leave home things change but it is still possible to have a close relationship. One of my favorite shows is Gilmore Girls. Lorelai and Rory, are mother and daughter, with a very close relationship. It has always been the two of them against the world. The comes a point in their relationship when they break apart and no longer talk. They don't know what is going on in each others life. They are estranged and strangers to each other.



I feel like I am going through something similar now. One day it will be changed but for now I miss her.

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