Doodledash

This was a paper written by my daughter when she was in 4th grade for a report. She wrote about herself and her thoughts at that time. It speaks for itself. I was born with a disease called Arthrogryposis. My mom had to have a c-section when I was born because the doctors knew I was probably going to be disabled and it was the safest way for me to be born. I had to stay in the hospital for three weeks until the doctors knew I was strong enough to go home. Arthrogryposis is a fairly rare disease. It comes from a Greek term which means hooked or curved joints. The joints become very stiff and form contractures. Muscles become weak and don’t develop the right way. All the joints in my body have been affected by it. I can’t hold my head up because my muscles are too weak. I am not able to move my arms or legs very much. I can’t run or walk and need to be in a wheelchair to get around. Most of the time Arthrogryposis doesn’t occur again in the same family. It usually isn’t a genetic disease...

There have been so many times in my life when I have been unhappy with myself and I have desperately wanted to change. I have found myself shedding tears out of total frustration because no matter how hard I tried, I just wasn't able to change. I didn't know how to do it. I have finally discovered the secret to the impossibe. I have to change my thinking and my long established habits. I have to speak positively and think of the way I want to be. When I find myself being negative, I have to stop myself and interrupt the thought. I have to say I am doing this, I have changed, I am a different person. Words of faith and changing my thoughts are the secret.

Have you ever considered what the world looks like from a wheelchair? It is a difficult and challenging view. Steps, curbs, doorways, bumps, sidewalks, sand, rocks, and mud are often impassable challenges. Steep grades and bumpy roads make driving hard. On my side of the family, my daughter is only able to visit my parents home. It is the only one that she can get into fairly easily. I have six brothers and she has never visited their homes because she can't get into the houses. There are no ramps and it is too hard to carry her and her chair anymore up steps. Doorways are narrow and there is little room in a house for a wheelchair. She has been able to visit her uncle in Omaha but he has several stairs inside his home that always stress me. Her grandma lives in a first floor condo that is wonderful and accessible for her. Traveling is always an adventure. You get very creative and you plan your destination and trips well. It makes life much easier to know that you can get somewher...

I find it is very easy for me to preach. I often end up preaching or lecturing to my family when I want to make a point. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. I don't mean to do it, it just ends up coming out the mouth. My youngest will get this look on her face and I realize that I have started in and she is more than happy to tell me that "I am boring her" and I better quit while the getting is good. The past few months have been really hard for me--emotionally, spiritually, and every which but loose. I have prayed for a long time to have the Lord change my heart and He has. I just didn't expect it to hurt so much. I have bombarded on all fronts and had to learn some hard facts about myself that I could no longer avoid. I am not always flexible. I am not always open minded. I am not always wrong. I am not always right. I have hurt the ones that I love by my attitudes. I have compromised with things and now I am paying the price. It is true that you reap what you sow.